Parenting is like kite-flying.  When you begin, you keep the kite close, work with it, and carefully control each move.

 

But the goal of kite flying is not to keep it close -- it is to watch it soar, to watch it do what kites do.  Parenting is like kite flying.

 

As you and the kite grow in your skill, you let the kite out farther and farther.  But dangers come along -- trees, wires, other kites -- and then you reel in the string to bring the kite closer.  You regain control, and as things stabilize, you let the string out again.

 

When Stephanie was 12, we thought that her math could use some real applications.  Carol and Steph decided that she should put her baby-sitting money, her gift money, and her other earned money from the farm in a checking account.

 

They went to the bank branch and talked it over with the manager.  The only way she could have a checking account was to have a joint account with her mother, and the account would require two signatures on each check.

 

She ordered the cute checks she wanted and they were printed with just her name and address at the top -- wow, she was very proud when those checks arrived.

 

She took this seriously.

 

On our farm, a particular project was proceeding  with a Michigan loader, two dozers, and two wheelers (dump trucks).  I knew our 10-year-old son wanted to get closer and closer to that action.  I suggested he make some lemonade, fill up a pitcher, get plastic cups, and ride down there on his ATV. Give those men a drink. So that’s what he did.

 

As the men drank, the wheelers pulled up for a return load. One truck driver&r

 

We never know just how much our children are picking up from us, no matter how young they are!

My third grandson was 13-months-old. He received two giraffes for Christmas -- the 4-foot giraffe we called “Jeffrey” and the 2-foot giraffe called “Little Jeffrey.”  Mommy and daddy taught him to discern between the two from their names.

 

In an effort to show off his son to me, his daddy said, “Watch this.”  He called to my grandson, “Get Jeffrey.” My grandson went into the next room and pulled that 4-foot giraffe to us.  Then daddy said, “Get Baby Jeffrey.”  My grandson stood there, seemingly perplexed.  No matter what his daddy said, my grandson didn’t get it.

 

So daddy went into the room and brought back “Little Jeffrey.”  Daddy didn’t realize he had mistakenly asked for “Baby Jeffrey” instead of the usual “Little Jeffrey."

 

But, in the meantime, my grandson had gone into his toybox and dragged out an 8” giraffe and stood it next to the two others!

 

If I could point to the most difficult thing about parenting, it would be the art of consistency.

 

Being consistent in what we say, in what we expect, in what we do, are all very difficult when raising children.  Consistency was the hardest attribute I faced.  And, it was one that the children picked up right away...”But Dad, last time you let us ___."

 

Oh, well. 

 

 

When our children developed language, we learned how much we “lie” to our children.  Yes, we lie to our children.

 

“Go to the car, honey, I’ll be there in a minute."

 

“I need to make a quick phone call before I help you."

 

Wow, what an awakening!  We develo

 

 

One of the great rewards of parenting is to watch our adult children exceed what we have done.

 

They resolve conflict better, they work on their marriages better, they handle their finances better, they raise their children better, and, in general, they are enriching the generations that will follow them.

 

Our personal heritage rests with them -- we see it today -- something we could not see as young parents with young children.

 

 

Many families we know from church and elsewhere speak of “teenage rebellion."  We did not experience that.  Was it because of homeschooling?  I don’t know.

 

Was it because we were great parents?  I don’t think so.

 

But two factors that probably mattered was that (a) we were WITH our children and they were WITH us. An

 

 

Parenting has frustrating moments.  One of which is miscommunication.

 

I heard a conference speaker offer a memorable solution to the miscommunication entitled, “Go clean your room."

 

He told us that some day when the child is not present, WE should clean the child’s room just as WE want it to look.  Then, take a camera, kneel down

 

 

Mothers and their growing teen boys have a special issue.  This is not science, not research; it is my observation and my opinion.

 

As a boy becomes a teen, I believe he is building a special circle.  This circle is uniquely his and one in which he will invite selected women.  This young man in his teens knows that his mother cannot be invited into that special circle -- it is reserved for women